Caffeine & Cynicism

you know what the worst thing to do is?
well, i was going to say to not eat your lunch, but then i thought, no, thats the second worst thing to do

the worst thing to do is to not eat your lunch AND then to leave the uneaten lunch at the bottom of your school bag until a collection of uneaten lunches start to pile up and suddenly you have so many uneaten lunches in your bag that you cant even fit your pencil case in
and you cant take them out and put them in the bin because your mum will find them and start in on you about how food isnt free and devon doesnt grow on trees (though it would be totally cool if it did because julia would have a mental breakdown), and she'll go on and on and on and on about it until you get so bored that you actually fall asleep right there in front of her, and then she'll start in about how rude your generation is, and how in her day nobody would fall asleep in front of their mothers and then you'll make some tactless comment about how old she is and next thing you know your mums in gaol and you only have half a leg and a chainsaw that doesnt quite work anymore left

so really the only thing you can do is let them collect, but then this turns out bad too, because after a while, all the old sandwiches start to look the same, and those look the same as todays sandwich, so really, when i eat my lunch, i dont know if what im eating is fresh or 3 months old, and the only way to find out is to take a bite

and you know what tastes even worse than a 3 month old sandwich?
a 3 month old snack pack
..
thats gone warm