Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Lord Howe: My Triumphant Return!!!

So I'm in this habit of travelling to Lord Howe Island every year, having the time of my life, then blogging about it. And obviously - being that I have no job/life/significant other - this year is no different.
Well, except that we went in Feb instead of Jan to avoid the school-holiday rush.
And that Catherine wasn't there, on account of her having joined the Navy and running off to do a thousand push-ups or whatever.
And that we didn't see Eric Bana.
Apart from that though? Totally the same. For example; just like last year (and the other 18 years before that), every spider on the whole island tried to kill me. And, just like last year (and the other 18 years before that), my parents totally ignored my anguished cries for help.
I hate spiders.
Hey, speaking of hating animals, did you guys know that dolphins gang-rape each other? Yep. Octopuses too, but I want the main focus to be on dolphins because lets be honest - octopuses (octopi?) are disgusting. Right? Ew. But dolphins? My entire dolphin-loving-childhood is totally tainted. I'll never think of dolphins the same way again. If I ate tuna, I would TOTALLY start buying the dolphin-non-friendly brand. I'm not gonna feel bad about it, either! I really think it would make a difference. And what a great thing to write on your tombstone:

Jacki Trew
She Saved The World,
Eating One Rapist At A Time

Anyway. We (being myself, Julia, Leigh and Anna) decided to combine our new-found love of groups with our new-found hatred of dolphins, and created a super-organisation known as Humans Against The Gang-Rape Of Dolphins...And Octopuses Too, I Guess. H.A.T.G.R.O.D.A.O.T.I.G for short.
Catchy, right? I'm thinking we should have t-shirts made:Now I'll talk about Eric Bana, but only for a second lest I get all devo about it. Yeah, that's right, I used the word lest in a blog. And in the same sentence as the word devo.
Suck it, Roseville English Department!
Okay so Eric was there, only three weeks before us. Sigh. Whose idea was it to come in February again? I would label whoever-it-was a total douche-lord, only I'm pretty sure it was one of my parents, so that might not be wise. You know, unless I'm okay with looking for a new place to live.
Which I am not.
Moving on!
There was a bit more rain than we're used to, so to fill the time we learned how to play Gin Rummy. And Trivial Pursuit. And Celebrity Heads. And one morning there was an extremely satisfying marathon round of Pictionary during which the 'adult' team was completely destroyed by the 'youth' and our nimble-wristed-drawing-abilities. Hell yeah.
We swam, we read, we snorkled, we rode bikes, we ate, I acted out scenes from Jane Austen's Persuasion with my feet (video to be posted soon, don't you worry)...all in all, it was a pretty kick-ass holiday. Then I got back to Sydney and remembered that
a) I have to go back to school tomorrow,
b) I have no clean clothes to wear,
c) The washing machine is full of my sister's sailing clothes, and
d) Our DVD player is broken
That last one doesn't relate - I'm just really annoyed about it.

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