Mum: You didn't say 'sorry, Mum' after the second time you said shit.
I am not even kidding. You didn't say 'sorry, Mum' after the second time you said shit? No laughs, either. Not even a giggle. Not even a grin.
Tough crowd, man. That mother of mine...I mean, what is that? What IS that? I'm funny, dammit! I mean, on occasion. I know it. Dad knows it. The internet knows it: My Mum gets all shitty when I swear on my blog. She hates it. It really pisses her off. It makes her fucking mad, yo. What swear words haven't I used yet? Crap. Boobs. Crap. Hi Mum! The weirdest thing about it is that she swears all the time. I actually edited her reaction to my last post. What she really said was:
Mum: Baisy, what the fuck? You didn't say 'sorry, Mum' after the second time you said shit.
Ha. 'Baisy' - for you out-of-towners - is my family nickname, which literally every person who is related to me has known me as since I was about 2. It means 'fuck' in French. Not a joke. As you can imagine, I am desperate for a holiday to France with my family.