Sunday, August 30, 2009

So, I just heard that the good people of Canberra have officially banned the selling/recreational use of fireworks.
Huh.
Congratulations, Government of Australia - your capital city just got even shittier!

Really though. I don't get it. I don't. I just don't get it. As if Canberra wasn't sucky enough, now they've gone and made the ONLY decent thing to do there illegal. Well, okay, one of the TWO decent things to do; I'm not going to pretend I don't love playing on the Sperm ride at Questacon. But still.
Fireworks.
Canberra.
Illegal.
And it's the worst kind of illegal, too. It's not like j-walking or homocide; you know, those are the types of crimes you can potentially get away with. But illegally setting off fireworks? Give me ONE possible scenario where you could get away with that.
...
...
See? It's impossible! Because there's no way to do it without someone seeing!
Unless, you know, your parents are cool with you setting the house on fire. In that case, grab some Catherine Wheels, lock yourself in the bathroom and go to town.
But just what are the rest of us supposed to do? I guess watching the Harbour Bridge ceremonially burst into flames once every 12 months is going to have to do.

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