Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Crappy, crappy day

Ok, I should start by saying that there is only one person (that I know of) who'll be able to FULLY appreciate this story.
Julia, you'll know why once you're done reading it.
Here goes.
A Few Days Ago
A few days ago, I needed to print something off for school, so I went downstairs to my parents room to do so. Oh, yeah, that's how printing works in my house. We each have our own laptops, but the only computer actually connected to a printer is the ancient desktop in my parents room. So if someone wants to print something, they have to email it to themselves, go downstairs, log into Hotmail on the desktop, and print it from there.
Wow, could I have said the word print any more in that last paragraph?
Probably not.
Anyway. So as I was loading some paper into the printer, I noticed there were a few dead ants in the paper slot. Huh. Kind of weird.
In hindsight, I probably should have investigated the matter further. But it was late, there weren't that many dead ants, and well, I'm a lazy asshole. So I just brushed them away, and resumed printing.
Then a few days went by.
Today I had some more printing to do. So I was halfway through, when the printer started beeping and flashing and telling me that the yellow and blue ink cartridges were empty. I went to lift the lid, you know, so I could replace them, and OH MY GOSH, THE INSIDE OF THE PRINTER WAS INFESTED WITH ANTS.
There were ants everywhere! Piles and piles! And, amongst the piles and piles of ants, there were piles and piles of these gross little while things I can only assume were ant eggs, just ready to hatch into more ants.
Oh my gosh, how traumatising for me.
So I found the ants. You know how sometimes, you have a moment, and you kind of wish someone was filming you? Just so you can replay it later, and laugh at yourself?
Yeah, this was one of those moments. Unfortunately, I'm not famous enough to be constantly filmed (yet. yet), so you guys will have to make do with just a description:

(I find the ants)
Me: Oh holy shit!
(I jump back from the printer
Me: Um. Um...
(I pause to silently curse my past self for ignoring the ants when I first saw them. Then, I move back towards the printer to inspect them more closely)
Me: Ew. Are those eggs?
(I look around)
Me: Who am I talking to?

Ha. If only my life was a movie - I think my favourite part would have been the expression on my face when I realised I was talking to myself.
So then I had to unplug the printer, take it out the back, and vaccuum all the ants out of it.
And THAT is why today was a crappy, crappy day. Just in case the bad weather, the lack of good shows on tv and the fact that there was nothing to eat in the WHOLE house isn't enough, lets add the fact that the highlight of my day was vacuuming an ant colony out of my printer.

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