attack of the killer blowfly

but seriously though
you guys are lucky im even here to live to tell this tale of horror because i almost got killed
again
oh yeah
so i was in the shower (yeah scene of the crime i know) and i heard this buzzing noise and i was like
OH
MY
GOSH
what is that? and i turned around and there it was, the biggest blowfly ive ever seen in my life it was probably the length of my arm it was so long and i was like
AAAAAAAAAH
and it was like
BUSZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
and i was like
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
and it was like
BUSZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
and i was like
AAAAAAAAAAAAAH
and from outside catherine was like
SHUT THE HELL UP

so then i had to have my whole shower around this stupid blowfly which kept, like, kamikazi divebombing my face and it was the scariest thing that has ever happened to me
and then, just now, when i was thinking of writing a lovely post about something lovely like how in 2 days we get to go back to modern and see emmy, i felt something on my arm and looked down and there it was
THERE IT WAS
there it was
THE KILLER BLOWFLY
ON MY ARM
TRYING TO SUCK OUT MY BLOOD WITH ITS KILLER BLOWFLY FANGS!
and you know what they say about flies dont you, the whole thing about how if they land on your skin it only takes them one second to vomit, poo and lay eggs on your skin
well this stupid evil blowfly was on my arm for like at least 3 seconds and also it was like 2,498 times bigger than a regular fly, so lets see that means it must have vomited, pood and layed eggs how many times..
(does calculations)
LIKE TEN DILLION TIMES
ohmigosh
OHMIGOSH
im going to DIE
that blowfly
oh gosh
its probably lurking like under my pillow as we speak and then when i go to lay my head down and fall asleep itll pounce and swallow my head whole
probably
i mean its me we're talking about