The magpies are plotting against me.
I tried to be nice. I tried to ignore them. I tried not to eat their eggs.
But thats it. enough is enough!
Everytime i walk home i have to walk through central park (which isnt really the real central park, its just the weeny park next to my house which also has the name central park). And everytime i walk through central park, im a perfect angel. I dont run to fast. I dont walk too slow. I dont throw tennis balls at the old folk. And every time - EVERY SINGLE TIME - I walk through central park, the magpies organise themselves into a diving squadron and bomb me like mini kamakazi acrobats covered in feathers.
no one else. just me.
so at first i thought it was just a coincidence. I thought they were just after my maroon school jumper or something. but no. no no no. because those stupid magpies try to kill me EVERY TIME i walk through that park NO MATTER WHICH outfit im wearing that day.
the magpies are trying to kill me. I can see it in their eyes. I can see the plots they make inside their tiny bird heads.
but I have a plan.
because obviously the magpies arent afraid of me. But they'll probably be afraid of my dads chainsaw.
those magpies are going down.