Caffeine & Cynicism

so basically, i just had the crappiest shower of my life
and i know what you're thinking
you're thinking 'how can any shower on earth possibly be any worse than that time jacki had a shower and the hot and cold labels on the taps were switched, so she didnt know what was going on and ended up scalding her entire body?'
well you're right. this shower wasnt that bad.
but it was still pretty bad.

first of all, the shower radio ran out of batteries. which might not seem like such a big deal to you normal, regular, non-freak, stands-completely-still-the-entire-time-theyre-in-the-shower people, but listen.
im not normal. im not regular. im a freak, and i certainly dont stand still the entire time im in the shower.
oh no. no no. i like to get down. i like to boogie. i like to get my freaking groove on, since dancing in the shower is pretty much the only exercise i get.
but how am i supposed to get my freak on without my shower radio, my precious source of water-proof music?
so there i was, sulkingly dancing, music-less, in the shower, when i realised...
hey. the soap isnt in the soap dish.
where, oh where, could that pesky soap be?
as i was wondering this, i stepped on the soap, (which had, in case you were wondering, fallen onto the floor, and oh-so-conveniently slid under my foot), and fell backwards through the door, hitting my elbow on the towel rack and my head on the sink, before collapsing into a bedraggled heap on the floor.
anyway after i managed to untangle my limbs, i got back into the shower, finished washing as quickly as i could, and got out, only to find that someone left my very very expensive (at $8.45) dove body lotion which i love oh so very much OPEN so that it had DRIED UP and i couldnt put any on and begin smelling like a spring-fresh petal.
so basically i was deprived of my favourite part of shower time.

anyway, i had to put on some body shop oceanus body lotion, which im assuming is from the stone age, since i found it in the cupboard under the sink, and anyone who's anyone knows that catherine and i never look in the cupboard under the sink on account of the fact that we put things in the cupboard under the sink for a reason, and that reason is that they smell like a graveyard.

so now im cold, cranky, unfit (from my lack of dancing in the shower), and i also smell like a graveyard.
crappy, crappy shower