Saturday, November 27, 2010

Holy crap, so much to blog about. Promotions at work, the possibility of me moving out, Navy Man's homecoming...let's start with this though:
Colgate Wisp. Have you guys heard about these? They're like mini toothbrushes with built-in toothpaste that you carry around in your handbag. What? Why? Who buys these? Woman who want to have dinner at The International House of Garlic and Tuna Fish and then make out with their boyfriends afterwards, I guess. Maybe they're intended for anyone with a teeth-cleaning-related OCD. Or maybe for this guy:

Regardless, it's hard to imagine a product more ridiculous than this. I mean, mini-brush with freshening bead?? Normally I am a huge fan of any person, place or thing that comes with the prefix 'mini', but this is going too far. Have you seen the commercial? With the girl brushing her teeth in the middle of a nightclub? Please. I'm not a violent person by nature, but if I ever saw someone actually using one of these things in public...well, they wouldn't be using one ever again, if you know what I mean.
They wouldn't have any reason to be using on ever again, if you know what I mean.
I'd rip their teeth out of their fucking head, if you know what I mean.

Anyway. Now that I'm done talking about that, let's have a laugh at my expense. Does anyone else ever find themselves so amusing that they take screencaps of their own text message conversations and post them on the internet? Yeah, me neither. Except for right now:

If this hairdressing thing doesn't work out, I'm definitely investigating a career in reality TV. After all, if Paris Hilton can get America to sit through an entire season of her pretending to find a new best friend, there's gotta be at least 10 people in the world who are bored/stupid/inebriated enough to watch me and my sister strap a size 35 Officer's Cap to our dog's head and march him around the house while humming the theme song to Sea Patrol. Not that we actually did that. I'm just saying.

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