Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Jacki's Rate of 08 (Get it? It rhymes!)

In 2008…
Something I Can’t Believe I did:
Kept blogging
Something I Regret:
My job choice
Something I Did That I’d Do Again:
Got a tattoo
Something I Did That I’ll Never Do Again:
Spend $3000 in 4 minutes
Something I Discovered I Love:
Eggplant
Something I Realise I Hate:
Folding clothes for a living
Something I Finally Accomplished:
Getting on TV
Something I Wish I’d Accomplished:
Meeting Wentworth Miller

In 2008, My Favourite…
· Song was: Midnight Train by Journey
· Food was: Mint Chocolate Chip Icecream
· TV Show was: Prison Break
· Singer was: Michael Jackson
· Movie was: Dirty Dancing
· Colour was: Yellow
· Drink was: Orange Juice and Coke mixed together
· Phrase was: ‘Disco Fabulous!’
· Day was: Wednesday
· Book was: Persuasion by Jane Austen
· City was: Seattle
· Smell was: MaDame by Jean Paul Gaultier

In 2008, The Best New…
· Song was: Talk Like That by The Presets
· Book was: The Twilight Series (sorry Kiera)
· Movie was: Tropic Thunder
· Thing I Bought was: $4 sunglasses from New York
· Internet Feature was: Facebook Chat

In 2008, The Worst New…
· Song was: Any of Britney’s new ones
· Book was: The Guiness Book of World Records, because it’s in 3D now, so every time I turn the page there’s some huge spider coming right at me
· Movie was: 10,000 BC (according to the Hirst family – I’m yet to experience it)
· Thing I Bought was: A bottle of Chinotto…wait maybe that was in 2007…whatever, it was so bad it’ll be the answer to this question for the rest of my life
· Internet Feature was: Um…Oh I know! The fact that nobody goes on MSN anymore…while, ironically, is probably because of my favourite new internet feature (Facebook Chat)

In 2008, I Had The Best Time…
In Seattle

In 2008, My Guilty Pleasure Was…
Shopping and Gossip Girl

In 2008, The Best Thing I Saw On YouTube Was…
THIS:

(BAAAHAHAHAHA)

5 Things I Did For The First Time In 2008…
· Went to Europe
· Had stitches
· Got a tattoo
· Dyed my own hair
· Lived with 5 boys

5 Things I Saw For The First Time In 2008…
· Tyra Banks – LIVE!!
· Times Square
· The movie ‘Whisper’
· Bones and Booth finally hooking up
· A ‘guy playing a guy, pretending to be another guy’


The 2008 Awesome List
· Prison Break Season 4
· The Presets
· Mousaka
· Seattle
· Those gladiator sandals that everyone is obsessed with
· My computer deciding to work again
· Home and Away being on YouTube
· Having money to spend
· Vandy
· A summer that actually feels like summer
· The Rachel Zoe Project

The 2008 Not-So Awesome List:
· The thong tan I had last summer
· Ham
· Ric Dolby’s hair
· Having a job
· Paris Hilton coming to Sydney for New Year’s
· That sorry excuse for The Rosevillian
· My dog becoming increasingly more senile

And summing up…
The Best Thing I Did In 2008 Was…
Re-enacting that scene in 10 Things I Hate About You where Heath Ledger sings ‘Can’t Take My Eyes Off You’ to Julia Stiles – On the very same stadium stairs where the movie was filmed.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

when idiots argue

jacki: (walks into Catherine's bedroom at midnight with laptop in hand) So. It's midnight, I'm bored, I figured we'd have a comparty
catherine: Alright, I'll just get my -
jacki: Thats right, comparty. I mixed the words computer and party together. See how I did, see how I came up with that?
catherine: (sighs) Yes. I get it. And for the third time, please stop explaining all your jokes to me.
jacki: I just want to make sure you know how funny I am.
catherine: Whatever. So let the "comparty" begin.

(10 minutes of absolute silence, the only noise being our fingers on the keyboards)

jacki: So...I'm probably going to go. Good talk though.
catherine: Well you weren't talking either!!

(Silence continues. Is broken when I make a clicking sound with my earring)

jacki: Ow
catherine: (Makes a face)
jacki: Did you hear that? (Dramatically) It was the bones in my ear shattering!!
catherine: You dont have bones in your ears.
jacki: You have cartilage.
catherine: Yes.
jacki: Yes.
catherine: But you said bone.
jacki: Well I meant cartilage.
catherine: Well how was I supposed to know that?!
jacki: I'm telling you right now.
catherine: Well you didn't tell me before.
jacki: (Tiring of the argument) Well thank goodness you corrected me.
catherine: Thankyou.
jacki: For..?
catherine: Admitting you're an idiot.
jacki: You're an idiot aswell sometimes!
catherine: Oh yeah, like when?
jacki: Like the other day, when you were telling me about those ATM robbers, who blow up ATMs and take all the money?
catherine: Yeah? And?
jacki: And you said they had stolen over 5 million dollars worth of money?
catherine: (Pauses) Yeah? So?
jacki: 5 million dollars worth of money? Its not 5 million dollars worth of money! Its 5 million dollars...END OF SENTENCE!!
catherine: Oh yeah, that was kind of stupid

(both laugh)
hahaha. we suck.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

bad phone day

I am having the worst phone day of my life.
Let me explain.
Usually I'm pretty ok on the phone. 5 months of on-and-off secretary work will do that to you. I mean, I'm no call centre operator or anything, but most of the time I can have a conversation with any random without any awkwardness.
Until today.

Phone call one:
Jacki: Hello, Jacki speaking
Random: Hi this is Heath from harris technology, is Phillip there please?
Jacki: No he's at work, can I take a message?
Heath: This is just regarding the Lenovo notebook he dropped off to be repaired
Jacki: Uh huh
Heath: Its ready to be picked up, I just need to give Phillip some details before he comes to get it...blah blah blah (rants for like 10 minutes about some crap)
Jacki: Ok, great, thanks
- This is where it got awkward. See, I thought Heath was going to continue talking, so instead of saying 'Bye', 'See you soon', whatever, I just stayed silent. But apparently Heath was done talking. So he stayed silent.
(Massive awkward pause. I'm not even kidding. It was like 40 freaking seconds).
Ok so at this point its too weird to say anything, right? So I just had to hang up! Without even saying goodbye! I HATE doing that.
Whatever. I could get over it. This was a one time thing, right?
Right?
WRONG!

Phone call two:
Random: University of New South Wales Service Desk, this is Janet speaking, how may I help you?
Jacki: Oh, hi, I was wondering if you could help me, I forgot my online uni ID, so I just tried all these random ones and now I've been locked out of the system. (Yes, this really happened. Yes, I am an idiot. But its another story for another day.)
Janet: (Probably fighting the urge to laugh) Ok sure. What we do is, we unlock all the accounts at the same time, so I'll do that now, and you should be able to log in in about half an hour.
Jacki: Ok, cool, thanks!

....
Ok, this time I had no excuse. I mean, really. She had already said everything she needed to say. There was no way I could possibly think she was going to continue talking. And yet, once again, I stayed silent, and an awkward pause ensued.
Except this time it was even more awkward, because after the 45 seconds or whatever, she goes...
Janet: Okay...thanks...bye?
...
Bye?
Like that. Like there was a question mark after it. Like she wasnt sure if I was mentally developed enough to know how to carry a normal phone conversation, and thought I needed to be reminded that once the discussion was over, you usually say goodbye and then hang up.
And I mean, rightly so.

Sigh. Hopefully this was just a two-time thing.
But just in case, nobody call me today.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Pimp My Mum

I just had a great idea for a new reality show.
Seriously.
Seriously.
I'm having visions of my own mother wearing parachute pants, a doorag, and $75,000 worth of clunky gold chains right now.
Oh. Oh. Legendary.

Kenneth Street

Ok one of the most annoying - MOST ANNOYING - things in the world to me is the fact that I am constantly stopped while walking around Longueville, by people who need directions to Kenneth Street.
Hmm. Alright, that was a lie. It's not really one of the MOST ANNOYING things in the world to me. I mean, top 100 for sure. But thats it. I just wanted to get your attention with capitals.
Anyway. Its true. Literally EVERY (again, not 100% true, but I think the capitals thing works) time I go for a walk, I get stopped by someone who cant find Kenneth Street.
Which really wouldnt be so annoying except that HELLO, its the BIGGEST street in Longueville.
...
AND LONGUEVILLE ONLY CONSISTS OF LIKE 4 STREETS.
Also the weird thing is that when I go for walks, I walk below Kenneth.
So you would think that, to get to where I am, people would have had to walk down the very street they are looking for.
What is this phenomonen? Do people not look at street signs anymore? Am I the only one who does that? It is totally 2007 to read street signs?
Or is everyone that lives outside of Longueville a complete moron?
Or is Kenneth Street actually part of a secret alternate universe, and the only people allowed in are the Longueville natives?
WHATS THE DEALIO, YO?
So apparently if you dont live in Longueville, Kenneth Street is invisible.
Or, you know, part of some alternate universe.
Sigh. Whatever.

Oh, also, on a completely unrelated note, there is apparently some serial killer out there named Scott Peterson.
...
I dont know about you guys, but thats a little too close to Gilmore Girls' actor Scott Patterson for my liking.
I mean.
Peter. Patter. COME ON!!!
...
Basically what I'm saying is that Luke is a murderer.
Mmm. Yep.
One Tree Hill rocks my freaking socks off.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Another Celebrity DoppelGanger Update

I cant believe I forgot this one:

Wentworth Clinic Man/ Tim Curry